9 Ways to Lie About Your Height

1. Round up to the nearest inch. I'm a shade over 5'9, therefore I can say with pride, "I'm 5'10."

Exception: People within 1½ inches of a foot can round up. Example, 5'10½ = 6 feet.

2. Athletes and celebrities get 3 free inches. They just do.

3. Get it on your drivers license. Most people behind the counter at the DMV won't question you, so go ahead and add a couple inches. Your license will provide quasi-proof about your height.

4. When lying about your height, wear platform shoes to avoid being called on it. This applies double if you are a famous actor dating Nicole Kidman.

5. Measure yourself in the morning. You might be ½ inch taller.

6. If you're old and shrinking, stick with your tallest height.

7. When in a group photograph, stand on your tip toes. Or, only appear in photographs with people shorter than you.

8. Consider being an astronaut or raising your children in space. I hear they grow taller with less gravity.

9. Grow a mohawk or afro and then measure your height to the top of your hair.


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