There's Something About Mary Movie Quotes

Stepfather: How'd you get the beans above the frank?

Stepfather: Boy, don't make me open up a can of whoopass!

Pat Healy: Husband; negative. Children and a Labrador; negative. Tight little package; affirmative.

Ted: He never even looked her up down there! He was down there closing his deal with the Rice-a-Roni people the whole time!

Magda: The last time I had a pap smear, the guy needed leather gloves and an oyster shucker.

Mary: Who needs him? I've got a vibrator!

Ted: I think I still want to look her up.
Healy: Who, rollerpig? Are you nuts?
Ted: You said she was a real sparkplug.
Healy: No, I said buttplug.

Warren: Have you seen my baseball?

Paramedic: We got a bleeder!

Healy: What the hell is Brett Favre doing here?
Brett Favre: I'm in town to play the Dolphins, you dumb ass.

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