Quotes from the Movie "Talladega Nights"


Cal Naughton, Jr.: I like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger.


Cal Naughton, Jr.: I wet the bed until I was 19. There's no shame in that.


Texas Ranger: Shut those mutts up before I cook 'em and eat 'em!


Ricky Bobby: Hi. I'm Ricky Bobby. If you don't chew Big Red, then fuck you.


Ricky Bobby: (While people try to restrain him) Get back, I'll windmill ya.


Ricky Bobby: It felt like I was on a spaceship.


Ricky Bobby: I'm just a big hairy American winning machine, you know?


Cal Naughton, Jr.: I like to picture Jesus in a tuxedo t-shirt because it says I want to be formal, but I'm here to party.


Ricky Bobby: Where are you Pepe Le Bitch?


Cal Naughton, Jr.: I like to think of Jesus as an Ice Dancer, dressed in an all-white jumpsuit, and doing an interpretive dance of my life.


Chip: Jesus was a man! He had a beard!


Lucius Washington: Don't you put that evil on us, Ricky Bobby!


Jean Girard: You spilled my macchiato!


Ricky Bobby: This sticker is dangerous and inconvenient, but I do love Fig Newtons.


Susan: Ricky Bobby is not a thinker. Ricky Bobby is a driver!


Bill Weber: Up next on NBC, Ice Dancing to the hits of Mo-Town.


Ricky Bobby: I'd love to sign your baby!


Ricky Bobby: I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence!


Ricky Bobby: Well, Let me give you a saying from Colonel Sanders. I am too drunk to taste this chicken


Jean Girard: You taste of America.
Ricky Bobby: Thank you.


Walker: My friends and I skipped school and we filled up a cup of pee and tried to get our neighbors dog to drink it. But he wouldn't.


More Random Chimp Stuff:

Grey's Anatomy Quotes

Varsity Blues Quotes

Grey's Anatomy Facts

The Hair Band Quiz - Do You Have What It Takes - To Answer Trivia About Hair Bands

The Cable Guy Quotes