Quotes from the Movie "Talladega Nights"

Cal Naughton, Jr.: I like to think of Jesus as a mischievous badger.

Cal Naughton, Jr.: I wet the bed until I was 19. There's no shame in that.

Texas Ranger: Shut those mutts up before I cook 'em and eat 'em!

Ricky Bobby: Hi. I'm Ricky Bobby. If you don't chew Big Red, then fuck you.

Ricky Bobby: (While people try to restrain him) Get back, I'll windmill ya.

Ricky Bobby: It felt like I was on a spaceship.

Ricky Bobby: I'm just a big hairy American winning machine, you know?

Cal Naughton, Jr.: I like to picture Jesus in a tuxedo t-shirt because it says I want to be formal, but I'm here to party.

Ricky Bobby: Where are you Pepe Le Bitch?

Cal Naughton, Jr.: I like to think of Jesus as an Ice Dancer, dressed in an all-white jumpsuit, and doing an interpretive dance of my life.

Chip: Jesus was a man! He had a beard!

Lucius Washington: Don't you put that evil on us, Ricky Bobby!

Jean Girard: You spilled my macchiato!

Ricky Bobby: This sticker is dangerous and inconvenient, but I do love Fig Newtons.

Susan: Ricky Bobby is not a thinker. Ricky Bobby is a driver!

Bill Weber: Up next on NBC, Ice Dancing to the hits of Mo-Town.

Ricky Bobby: I'd love to sign your baby!

Ricky Bobby: I wake up in the morning and I piss excellence!

Ricky Bobby: Well, Let me give you a saying from Colonel Sanders. I am too drunk to taste this chicken

Jean Girard: You taste of America.
Ricky Bobby: Thank you.

Walker: My friends and I skipped school and we filled up a cup of pee and tried to get our neighbors dog to drink it. But he wouldn't.

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