Quotes from the movie "Goodfellas"

Henry Hill: As far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a gangster. To me, being a gangster was better than being President of the United States.

Henry Hill: What Jimmy really loved to do, what he really loved to do was steal. I mean he actually enjoyed it. Jimmy was the kind of guy who rooted for the bad guys in the movies.

Henry Hill: Paulie may have moved slow, but it was only because Paulie didn't have to move for anybody.

Henry Hill: Saturday night was for wives, but Friday night at the Copa was always for the girlfriends.

Henry Hill: It took the jury six hours to bring us in guilty. The judge gave Jimmy and me ten years like he was giving away candy.

Henry Hill: That's how it happens. That's how fast it takes for a guy to get whacked.

Henry Hill: For a second, I thought I was dead, but when I heard all the noise I knew they were cops. Only cops talk that way. If they had been wiseguys, I wouldn't have heard a thing. I would've been dead.

Henry Hill: Jimmy had never asked me to whack somebody before - but now he's asking me to go down to Florida and do a hit with Anthony? That's when I knew I would never have come back from Florida alive.

Morrie: What am I? A schmuck on wheels?

Tommy DeVito: Sure, mom, I settle down with a nice girl every night, then I'm free the next morning.

Tommy DeVito: What the fuck are you doing? You're hanging around my fuckin' neck like a vulture, like impending danger.

Tommy DeVito: You know Spider, you're a fuckin' mumbling stuttering little prick. You know that?

Jimmy Conway: Don't buy anything. Don't get anything. Nothing big. Didn't you hear what I said?...you're going to get us all fuckin' pinched, that's why. What are you, stupid?

Jimmy Conway: Everybody gets pinched. But you did it right. You told 'em nothing and they got nothing...I'm proud of you. You took your first pinch like a man and you learned the two greatest things in life...Never rat on your friends and always keep your mouth shut.

Jimmy Conway: He shot him in the foot 'cause he told him to go fuck himself!

Paulie Cicero:You broke your cherry!

Paulie Cicero:You think you're the only one? I talk to them a million times. They don't listen...What could I do? If there was something I could do, don't you think I would do it?...Tommy's a bad kid. He's a bad seed. What am I supposed to do, shoot him?

The how am I funny scene:

Henry: You're a pisser, you're really funny. You're really funny.
Tommy: What do you mean I'm funny?
Henry: It's funny, you know. It's a good story, it's funny, you're a funny guy.
Tommy: what do you mean, you mean the way I talk? What?
Henry: It's just, you know. You're just funny, it's... funny, the way you tell the story and everything.
Tommy: Funny how? What's funny about it?
Anthony: Tommy no, You got it all wrong.
Tommy: Oh, oh, Anthony. He's a big boy, he knows what he said. What did ya say? Funny how?
Henry: Just.
Tommy: What?
Henry: Just... ya know... you're funny.
Tommy: You mean, let me understand this cause, ya know maybe it's me, I'm a little fucked up maybe, but I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown, I amuse you? I make you laugh, I'm here to fuckin' amuse you? What do you mean funny, funny how? How am I funny?
Henry: Just... you know, how you tell the story, what?
Tommy: No, no, I don't know, you said it. How do I know? You said I'm funny. How the fuck am I funny, what the fuck is so funny about me? Tell me, tell me what's funny!
Henry: Get the fuck out of here, Tommy!
Tommy: Ya motherfucker! I almost had him, I almost had him. Ya stuttering prick ya. Frankie, was he shaking? I wonder about you sometimes, Henry. You may fold under questioning.

More Random Chimp Stuff:

Fight Club Quotes

Usual Suspects Quotes

Animal House Quotes

The Tough Vocabulary Quiz - You're pretty smart if you can define these words

Liar Liar Quotes