Caddyshack Movie Quotes

Ty Webb: Just be the ball, be the ball, be the ball. You're not being the ball Danny.
Danny Noonan: It's hard when you're talking like that.

Al Czervik: This place is restricted Wang, so don't tell them you're Jewish!

Al Czervik: Last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it.

Lacey Underall: My uncle says you've got a screw loose.
Ty Webb: Your uncle molests collies.

Spalding Smails: Doodie!

Al Czervik: Oh, this your wife, huh? A lovely lady. Hey baby, you must've been something before electricity.

Al Czervik: You're a lot of woman, you know that? Yeah, wanna make 14 dollars the hard way?

Al Czervik: He called me a baboon, he thinks I'm his wife.

Judge Smails: How about a Fresca?

Ty Webb: A flute without holes, is not a flute. A donut without a hole, is a Danish.

Mrs. Smails: Elihu, will you come loofah my stretch marks?

Carl Spackler: Bark like a dog.

Spalding Smails: I want a hamburger... no, a cheeseburger. I want a hot dog. I want a milkshake...
Judge Smails: You'll get nothing, and like it.

Ty Webb: What brings you to this nape of the woods, neck of the wape; How come you're here?

Danny Noonan: I gotta go to college.
Ty Webb: You don't have to go to college. This isn't Russia. Is this Russia? This isn't Russia.

Ty Webb: You're rather attractive for a beautiful girl with a great body.

Judge Smails: I've sentenced boys younger than you to the gas chamber. Didn't want to do it. I felt I owed it to them.

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